Q & A: Are We Ready For Marriage?

Q: I am very excited about my wedding, but a little nervous about marriage. What is one thing I can do to prepare for marriage?

--Denise H.

A.  It’s difficult to plan for every aspect of marriage.  Sure, we may plan when we want to buy a house or start a family. But in order to be truly effective as a newly married couple, you can create a kind of GPS system called a family mission statement.

 A GPS system helps you get to the place where you want to go without getting lost. Whenever there is an adjustment made or if you fall off track by making a wrong turn, the GPS system will make the adjustments needed to ensure you end up at your destination.

 A family mission statement acts the same way. In marriage, by having a clear vision will help you rise above the challenges and the obstacles that occur in life. By creating a family mission statement you are not just creating a relationship contract, but a relationship covenant that can grow and change to reflect the growth and changes in your marriage and family.

 Some questions that will help with the process are as follows.  Don't wait till AFTER the marriage to get these answers even if you have lived together for years. 

   1. If you had to create by-laws for your marriage partnership, what would they be?
   2. If you had to create a support group for people outside your family what would it be and why?
   3. How do we want to resolve your differences?
   4. If you had to display 3 emotions on your wall that signify your family what would they be?
   5. When a child comes, what kind of parents do you want to be?
   6. What principles do you want to teach your children to help them prepare for adulthood and to lead responsible lives?
   7. You see that a child has the potential to be excellent in X, how will you promote it?
   8. What sort of discipline do you want to use?
   9. What traditions from which the families you were raised do you bring within your family? Which new ones do you create?
  10. What principles do you want your family to operate by?

-Keith Dent, Strive 2 Succeed